Learn the real reason you get paralyzed in social situations,
the most important things you need to make friends as an adult,
and how to never run away from conflict again.
You feel different, defective, alien, flawed, weird, strange, or like a freak.
You identify with being a hermit, outcast, lone wolf, outlaw, loner, or misfit.
You've convinced yourself that you like being alone and that it's empowering for you to "take care of yourself" even though, deep down, you feel lonely and desperate for connection. You know you want to have friends who "get you" and relationships that are safe to be yourself in, but you're tired of being hurt and taken advantage of, so you keep putting it off.
Your greatest fear is that once people see the real you, they won't like you, so you're constantly wondering if people are mad at you.
You agree to go to a social gathering, only to cancel last minute because you feel sick to your stomach. And when you do manage to go, you spend the whole time stuck in your head, judging every word you say or don't say, and spend the drive home in a shame spiral. You want to be present and share your quirky sense of humor, but you're not sure if it's possible for you.
This impacts everything in your life. Not only do you think everyone hates you, but you secretly hate yourself too. You have trouble getting jobs you want and the relationship struggles you have outside of work distract you from doing your best at work. You overeat, drink, shop or doom scroll on social media to numb the loneliness, which is impacting not only your physical health but your mental health too. And you feel like a burden to the one or two people who are there for you because they're all you've got.
As a nerdy, neurodivergent girl with social anxiety, I didn't feel like I fit in anywhere. So when I became a coach, I spent a lot of time unwinding my insecurities and fears.
In school, I was bullied and had a hard time keeping friends. I carried the idea that I'm too different to be liked into adulthood.
The shift started when I moved out of my parent's house after college and into a condo by myself. I got to see for myself that being alone was not the answer. When my then-fiance, now husband moved in with me, I had to learn how to express myself without me screaming during disagreements.
It started the snowball of being honest about how I feel in every situation, taking responsibility for my actions, leaning into conflict instead of harboring resentments, and celebrating who I am in a vulnerable way with the people around me, without needing them to validate me. It was life-changing.
Keep reading and I'll share with you how I did it.
You leave social gatherings feeling as whole and valuable as you do when you're by yourself in nature.
When someone asks you if you want to go to a concert for a band you dislike, instead of blurting out, "that would be great!" before you can stop yourself and then sheepishly saying you can't go when the event gets closer, you instead say, you don't like that band without worrying how they'll react.
You're willing to hear "no" because you don't depend on them for your self-worth. You're willing to bring up when things are bothering you. Instead of spending months wondering if they're mad at you, you call them, sort it out, and cheerfully move on with your day.
You have a group of friends that ask about you and are there when you need them. They love all your quirks and are interested in your latest interests and adventures.
When something upsetting happens, you know how to process your feelings and regulate your nervous system. You can calm yourself down and feel safe knowing that you've got your own back.
Join me for 3 months of private one-on-one coaching to receive a guided, customized process to overcome social awkwardness, improve your current relationships and make 1-3 new friends.
"Jessica is a rare coach. She quickly and easily sees the resistance and patterns that are at the heart of what holds you back. I’ve learned so much from her gentle wisdom and guidance, I can’t recommend her enough."
- Carolyn E.
"Thanks so much, Jessica, for helping me get through a tumultuous time, equipping me with tools to help work through difficult emotions and patterns I didn’t know existed. I wouldn’t be where I am today if I hadn’t worked with Jessica!"
- Samantha K.
"Jessica’s coaching was a game changer, her compassionate listening and skillful questioning gave me clarity and confidence to move forward in making big life shifts."
- Tracy C.
never again spend the drive home berating yourself after social events.
know what you can handle, and only say yes to what you want to, so you can get out of the dance of when to cancel and what excuse to use.
no longer make being neurodivergent, different, introverted, or highly sensitive mean you need to change something about yourself.
be able to get out of your head and be more present in any situation so you can say what you want to say and be the person you know you are deep down.
Three months of one-on-one coaching and support. It all starts with a free discovery call to specify your goals, see if we're a good fit, and answer your questions.
I'm certain you'll create a better relationship with yourself and others while we're coaching together, so I offer a 100% money-back guarantee, no questions asked. If the coaching isn't what you expected, you can cancel and get a full refund at any time during the three months we're working together.
Putting off this investment in yourself and thinking you should be able to figure this out on your own, puts your current relationships at stake and leaves you just as lonely and miserable.
I spent a year avoiding a conflict with a friend that was solved in a few sentences and a 15-minute phone call. Without this work, we wouldn't still be friends and it would have been a big loss for a simple misunderstanding. If I'd faced my fears sooner, we could have avoided a year of suffering.
Coaching has gotten my clients out of many painful situations including:
Without coaching, they would all probably still be in these situations, believing "life is meaningless and then you die" or "good things aren't meant for me," but that simply isn't true. Every minute you spend ignoring your dreams because you're worried it won't work out is a minute you'll spend in pain that could have been avoided.
This is your life we're talking about. You deserve better and I can help you get it.
Coaching feels like magic but it's backed by science. Experience it for yourself before you commit.
We'll dive into the details about your plans and goals, which makes you 52% more likely to succeed, even if we decide not to work together.
The call allows us to make sure we work well together. If I know a better coach for you, I'll refer you and send you off with a few helpful tips.
Once we clarify your goals, I'll coach you on one thing that's standing in your way. I set aside up to 2 hours to make sure you leave with valuable information.
Here are the answers to the most common questions.
What topics can I get coached on?
Anything that's bothering you is welcome in our coaching calls. Every problem in life comes down to a relationship between you and yourself or between you and someone else, so whatever you bring to coaching will also help you with your main goals. I'll show you how they connect.
Do you offer refunds?
Yes, your satisfaction is important to me, so I offer a 90-day 100% money-back guarantee. If you decide that the coaching isn't right for you for any reason, simply write me an email during our coaching relationship and I'll give you a full refund. No questions asked.
What is coaching? What's special about your coaching?
Coaching a co-creative relationship that helps you get beyond your perceived limits and fears. It's more powerful than advice because I'll help you come up with solutions that are unique to your experience and desires.
My coaching is different than other coaches because I combine the right brain with the left brain, the mindset with the body, and creativity with scientific methods.
My coaching is empathetic and effective. You can expect calls to be a safe, judgement-free zone for you to be yourself.
What's the difference between coaching and therapy?
Therapy treats mental health concerns and tends to be past-focused, whereas coaching tends to be present and future-focused. The goal of therapy is to help you cope with mental health conditions and past traumas.
Coaching does not treat or diagnose mental health conditions and the goal of coaching is to help you achieve your dreams and become the person you want to be.
If I feel a person needs extra support with past experiences or mental health concerns, I refer them to a therapist.
Why twelve sessions/3 months?
At first, a lot of the work in coaching is internal and takes time to show up in your external life. Within twelve sessions, you will start to see outward progress. And by coming weekly instead of biweekly or monthly, you'll see progress faster.
Often I personally prefer working with a coach for 6 months, but it can be a big initial investment. So by offering 3 months of coaching instead, it allows you to not have to make such a big investment upfront and if you're enjoying the coaching and want to keep going, you can resign at the same rate you paid even if the prices on my website have increased.
Why phone sessions and not Zoom?
When I started my business, I did all my sessions over Zoom, but after working with coaches who coached me over the phone and trying it with my own clients, I found that people were actually more willing to be vulnerable and open over the phone.
Being on camera can feel like a performance, which can be distracting and nerve-wracking. I want you to feel safe to be yourself as much as possible, so you can get the best results. Being on the phone allows you to move around and be more immersed in the coaching.
Shouldn't I be able to figure this out on my own?
You're probably familiar with the shame of feeling like your relationship with yourself and others should be something you've figured out by now. I used to be there too. I read all the books, tried to willpower myself through change, and would just end up beating myself up for not having it figured out yet.
Sure, if you keep going you'll probably stumble on something that works. But haven't you been trying that for a while now? Wouldn't you rather work with an expert who has paved the way for you and can offer you proven strategies?
How do I get started?
Click the button below and fill out your information including a few times you're available. I'll get back to you in 1-2 business days to confirm a time that works for both of us.
The discovery call gives us a chance to make sure we're a good fit and there is absolutely no pressure on the call. I want you to do what's best for you. If we're not a good fit, I'm happy to refer you to other amazing coaches and leave you with a few tips to help you move forward.